BULLYING AT KHS - EVEN IN OUR DAY

I am sure all of our classmates who use any social media, watch TV news or read newspapers know that the subject of bullying is a current, often-discussed problem.  I have an idea, unsubstantiated, that not many of us in our closed, warm, healthy childhood environment in Kirkwood experienced much bullying.  I did - my first few days as the new kid in Miss Clark's 2nd grade class were spoiled by a guy whose name I forget, he didn't go up thru the grades with us, who called me "Nestles" - he was black, I was from a KS school where I had no black schoolmates, and it embarrassed me.  He quit doing it, I got over it, I haven't forgotten it but it certainly did not affect my mental health then or ever after.  It wasn't really bullying anyway, it was teasing to call attention to my "newness".  But you likely get my drift. BTW my best friend in that class was Mattie Hall, who sat right by me and we were friends for years.  She right away offered me her extra pencil and some paper on my first day in class...mom didn't think to send any along with me that day, go figure!

Today I received a Facebook private message from our classmate Jon Mangold, who was with us for awhile at KHS but then moved so did not graduate with us.  Through Social Media, Jon got in touch with our class through me and we are friends on FB.  We comment back and forth from time to time, but today's message was different.  He was reaching out for a platform, and in light of the current environment in our society, I am delighted to provide it.  Please read the following essay if you will, by Jon.  The person who was guilty of bullying Jon is no longer living, so we are using his name.  Of course he is no longer here to defend himself, but I print the story to give Jon a way to share his experience and point up the sad result of bullying.  Yes, it's too late for us to guide our own children away from that behaviour but perhaps not too late for us to influence others in the unfortunate results of bullying  If you wish to contact Jon, he is Jonathan Mangold on Facebook.  

"Hi, Leslie.  The recent shooting in Florida has caused me to think about how I was bullied in school. As a junior, I sat in front of Jim Moulder in Art Stout’s math class. Jim liked to flick my ears during class. I never knew when it would happen, but it happened every class and it hurt. We sat far enough forward in the classroom so others had to have seen what was going on but no one said anything. I never told Mr. Stout what was going on. I could’ve asked to be moved, but that would mean I would have to tell him what was going on and I was afraid I’d be even in more trouble with Jim and his big friend who sat behind him than I was already. I was terrified. I couldn’t sleep thinking about what might happen to me the next day. I’ve only recently become aware of how this has affected my relationships with men—particularly men who are bigger than me. I am hypervigilant around bigger men and find myself trying to ingratiate myself in hopes that they will not terrorize me. Had I owned a gun then, I might have gone to school and shot up the place. Being bullied is that bad. This is serious business, probably worse now than then. If you see someone being bullied, don't just stand there. Say something. Tell someone. Do something, for everyone's sake.  I don't want anyone to get the idea that I harbor thoughts of shooting anyone now!  I didn't then, in fact It never occurred to me to retaliate."

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Thank you Jon for sharing this experience with us.  While for the most part I believe, from 50+ years of being in touch with our classmates as we have aged (I HATE that word), that within reason and some variations, most of us led pretty charmed lives as kids growing up in Kirkwood.  But stories such as this remind us that not everyone lived that charmed existence.  I hope others will read this and be moved to share their stories, or at least give thought to the subject!

PATTY HAMMER HOBIN LOSES HER HUSBAND

I noticed a very short obituary in a recent Post Dispatch issue and the surname was very familiar.  From my database I realized the deceased was the husband of our classmate Patty Hammer.  I did some sleuthing and found the obituary for Larry Hobin.  I tried to post this on Facebook but for some reason I can't post anything on either of my KHS65 FB pages!  Gotta love Facebook.  I doubt the address in our 50th Reunion book is accurate but one can send condolences through the funeral home.

Obituary for Laurence D. Hobin

Laurence D. Hobin, 72 0f Bonita Springs, FL died Thursday, January 18, 2018 at his residence. He was born December 7, 1945 in St. Louis, MO, a son of the late Ralph C. Hobin and Dorothy Jones Hobin.
Laurence served in the U.S. Air Force. He worked as a truck driver in St. Louis for Anheuser-Busch and then as a fire fighter in Wisconsin.
Surviving are his beloved wife Patty Hammer Hobin; son Tyler (Elouise) Andreas of Naples, FL; daughter C.C. (Harry) Brody of Chicago, IL; son Tanner (Jennifer) Hobin of St. Louis, MO; daughter Caitlin (Jeff) Dickerson of Chicago, IL; 8 grandchildren; brother Patrick Hobin of Lake of the Ozarks, MO; and sister Gayle Schroyer of St. Louis, MO.
No services are scheduled at this time.
On line condolences may be left by visiting www.ShikanyFuneralHome.com
Arrangements are being handled by Shikany’s Bonita Funeral Home & Crematory. Family owned and operated since 1978.

THOSE PASSING ON

It is always sad to report the death of our classmates, but luckily I have not learned of any additional deaths recently.  For several years now I have been reporting on the deaths of our classmates' parents, especially when they have lived particularly long lives. Having lost my parents 23 years ago, I am always envious of those who were able to keep theirs so much longer.  Now we are losing parents who are at or near the 100 year milestone, what an achievement.  I wanted to share a few tidbits here, being a bit behind due to having been sick with double pneumonia for several weeks.  I THINK I am on the mend, and so glad to be back to my real life!  Please do let me know if you learn of any deaths of note related to our classmates.  

LINDA KAROL HUEBNER
Linda was the widow of our Robinson School and KHS65 classmate Charles Huebner.  She died December 5 living in Maryland Heights.  Charlie didn't participate in our reunion activities but I did meet Linda years ago. I believe she worked at The Frame Factory at which I did a lot of framing and I noted her name badge, and her unusual name, and chatted of course, and it turned out that she was married to Charlie. She was a Lindenwood graduate, and there are no children listed in her obituary.  They were very active in the Southside Imperial Dance Club and the greater St. Louis swing dance community for many years.  She was also a founding member of the Jimmy Buffet Parothead Club. They traveled all over the world, loving St. John's, VI especially.  There was a memorial service at Bopp on January 6.  Perhaps some of you have some connection to her and/or Chuck, as he was apparently known, through the dance interest.

HELEN HENRY BURTCH
Mrs. Burtch of course was our classmate Polly's mom who died January 5 at the age of 97.  She had 5 grands and 8 great-grands.  She was a member of the founding docent group at St. Louis Art Museum, an avid golfer, an accomplished needleworker and a longtime member of the Jane Austin Society of North America.  Her full obituary is here:
http://www.luptonchapel.com/memsol.cgi?user_id=2057467.    Our condolences to Polly and her wonderful family.  Polly has 3 children and 5 grands!!!  Lucky girl!

ROBERT C. HOLT, JR.
Mr. Holt passed away at age 96 on  December 31st.  His daughter, Sharon, was in our class and I shared a class or two with her.  Mr. Holt was with the St. Louis Post Dispatch for 40 years retiring in 1995.  He was a photographer who captured scenes and activities around town for all those years as well as into his retirement.  His special interest was our wonderful Zoo. I can only imagine the photo of Phil the Gorilla having a beer with George Vierheller!  Phil was and still is my favorite attraction at our zoo.  If you haven't seen his statue, it is reason enough to visit the Zoo, but check out the flamingos as long as you're there!  Mr. Holt was a World War II Veteran having served as a pilot in the South Pacific, and having been awarded flight wings by both the Army and the Navy.  His full obituary is at:
http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/stltoday/obituary.aspx?n=robert-c-holt-bob&pid=187761940
Our condolences also to Sharon and her family, another of our classmates whose parents had long, meaningful and full lives.